I really really enjoy pundit Scott Galloway (@profgalloway) and his newsletter today he shared this critical relationship advice. It tracks with what I’ve learned, for myself through mistakes, through therapists, and through personal reading. It’s sharp, as all his writing typically is:
Don’t keep score. It’s human nature to inflate your own contribution to the relationship and minimize your partner’s. Couples who are always taking notes on who’s done what for whom waste energy, and ultimately both feel as if they’re in the loss column. Decide if the relationship, on the whole, gives you joy/comfort, and if it does (and it better, at this point), then commit to always being on the positive side of the ledger — aim to be generous and do as much for your partner, as often as possible. Be willing to wipe the slate clean if and when your partner messes up, as she/he will. Studies show that forgiveness is a key attribute to sustainable, happy relationships. One of the main components of our success as a nation is we give people a second chance. It’s no different in relationships — achieving real love and a sense of partnership will likely involve forgiveness that, at the time, feels unfair and even embarrassing.
You should follow L2inc on YouTube for his great thoughts on current tech. Even when I disagree with his takes, they always challenge me to think harder and more plainly about things. Whether that’s relationships or big tech or current trends.