Pants that are too big are good for holding a sealed beverage. Useful for my cold green tea. Shoplifting also somewhat more feasible. Though I’ve not shoplifted since I was 11 and living in New Orleans. Two times: both from a drugstore on my way to Christ the King Catholic School. First time: Baby Ruth candy bar. So easy and eaten so fast the wrongness came and went fast from my conscience. I planned the next job for a week. An expensive and really sweet Halloween skull mask. I visited it every day on the way to school. It smashed down into my khaki uniform pants pocket well. In preteen economic terms that *sin* was like 20 times worse than the chocolate and peanuts I had pilfered. Also, the mask stayed around in exactly the way an eaten candy doesn’t. But I had to look at it. And in a mirror too. I wish I could say I gave it back but no. So I need pants and don’t plan criminal commandment breaking anymore but I like Halloween still.

I forgot about the glass Del Taco ashtray I took when I was 16. That feels more like an anti smoking political act now though.